The Do-Over
Take responsibility for your words, actions, and expressions.
While we all try to communicate to others in an adult, professional,
and un-emotional way, yet there are those times when we say things we regret later,
or say stuff that we meant to come out differently than it actually came out.
Here are some ideas to help your improve your communications with others.
Think first, speak last. This gives you a few moments to sound it out to yourself before it goes out to the world.
Feel your tone of voice. What emotions am I sending out?
Hear your words. Do they make sense, express your thoughts, and communicate your message as intended.
Catch yourself. Catch yourself when you screw up.
Instantly express a sincere, "I'm Sorry" and follow with' "I don't like the way that came out, I want to try it again".
The Do-Over can make up for many communication mishaps immediately rather than facing the issue later.
"Communication is not saying something, communication is being heard."
----L Ron Hubbard
My Friend Karim Hajee's Newsletter
"Though I might travel afar, I will meet only what I carry with me, for every man/woman is a mirror. We see only ourselves reflected in those around us. Their attitudes and actions are only a reflection of our own. The whole world and its condition has its counter parts within us all. Turn the gaze inward. Correct yourself and your world will change." ~ Kirsten Zambucka
***********************************************
So just what do you see?And just how do you see things?
How do you see the people around you?
How do you view your friends, family, colleagues, associates, strangers, sales people, etc? Do you see some of them as positive influences and others as negative influences?
Do you think some of them are a pain, annoy you, aredifficult, frustrate you or out to get you? Or do you see them as friendly, warm, caring, affectionate, loving,
understanding, positive people.
How you see people is what you bring out of them.
For example if you see a sales person as annoying you're going to always find and attract annoying sales people. If you see a familymember as a pain, your always going to bring out the side in thatperson that is a pain towards you. If you see your colleagues as jealous, competitive or vindictivethen you're always going to bring out those qualities in thembecause that's what you see in them and that is what you believe istheir character. What you believe is what you get.
Now I know some of you are going to say: "Karim, these people are that way - I'm not making this stuff up. They really are nasty."Sure they are, and you keep bringing out the worst in them byfocusing only on seeing the dark side of their character. Everybody around you has some redeeming qualities look at those positive qualities within in them and you'll get them to display those qualities more often.
Next - ask yourself: "Is that really the way they are?" Challenge your perception and see if you can choose to see things differently. Chances are when you look really closely most people are not as mean and unkind as you think they are. They probably think that they're being very nice but since you only see the negative qualities in them anything they do will be deemed negative.
Once you've perceived them to be a certain way there's nothing that they can do to change your mind. The only way you will truly see the good in the other person is tofocus on and see their good qualities then you'll actually see them displaying these qualities more often.
Look for the good in someone and you will only attract good things to you.
Change the way you see people.
Change the way you see life.
Begin to believe that good things can happen and you begin to use the Power Of Perception.
You can read more of Karim at his website www.creatingpower.com
A Loving Way to a Better Way
A Loving Way to a Better Way
Remember when you were a child, a small bandage, a hug and a kiss could cure most anything, from a cut finger to a broken toy. That universal truth is still in existence. Love can still mend a broken heart, save a lonely soul, and heal a broken toe. It can bring joy to a saddened heart, light into darkness, and peace into a stressful situation. Love can cure depression, and addictions. It can be the force that can change any emotional event, circumstance, or situation into one of compassion, and empathy, and on occasion it can even bring sunshine to a rainy Saturday afternoon.
How do we bring more love into our lives?
How do we send out love?
I feel that we do not take the time to learn and develop the essence of this mystical universal principle of love heals all. While receiving love is no doubt the ultimate healing potion ever believed you must be able to send love before you can receive love. It is the sending of love to any other living being that creates the most beneficial results when it comes to the health and wellness of your heart and soul.
When love is an action instead of a feeling and sent out expecting nothing in return, the real magic begins. This universal principle of nature holds true in everything we do. Every action of love toward another living being, whether it be in spirit, a person, an animal, or plant, the universe will respond with magic back to you in many forms. The most common is the feeling of well being and euphoria that comes over your entire body. You naturally boost all of your immune systems. You walk with a spring in your step. You find that some of the small things that used to irritate you now don’t seem all that important. You find that each day you awake with a new vitality for life and a willingness to do something great.
So how do we use this universal law to be the best person toward others that we can be?
How do we send out unconditional love for everyone and everything into the universe without expectation of anything in return? Where do we start?
With yourself, always with yourself. It is an inside out approach.
Honesty, sincerity, and truthfulness are the foundations of this universal truth, and until you can be honest and truthful with yourself, and be sincere from within your heart in you actions, you can not realize these magical powers.
Before you can give away love to others you must have love to give away. It must come from a place within your soul that is serene and peaceful. Not full of stress, anxiety, jealousness, or a need to be first or more important than anyone else. If you are full of stress, anger, anxiety, and jealously, that’s what you send out to others. If you are full of kindness, peace, happiness, and love then that is what you to send out.
This may require a complete change from within you. Most of us feel that we are kind and loving people who would normally do most anything for another in need. We may put some loose change in the hand of the homeless. We send a check to a charity organization once a year, or give some can food to get a movie discount. These are all acts of kindness and this kindness may often be rewarded, but not with that warming feeling of peacefulness that spreads throughout your entire body, and causes you to look at yourself and others in a more loving way. The type of euphoric feeling I am referring to comes from deeper inside of us. It comes from a place where we do these unselfish acts unknowingly, because it is what we must do, not because we have a guilty conscious or an unmet need.
The only way that unselfish love will express itself from within you is if that is truly what is inside you. Almost as if you cannot send out anything else, think anything else, or be any other way toward yourself or another.
Start today, look at yourself in the mirror and make the choice that whatever events or circumstances come your way today, that in your heart of hearts you will respond with love, peace, and kindness. It may be another driver that cuts you off in traffic or a coworker that always seems to upset you with their words or actions. It may be a relative or loved one that you seem to always disagree with. Decide that today for everything that happens you will respond from that goodness in your heart, the unconditional love that was embedded in your spiritual soul at the time you were created. Decide to look for the good and the positive in any person, or situation.
Remarkable things will begin to happen. When you focus your attention on the good rather than the bad, the love, rather than the sad, you will begin to notice that everything around you will change. Everyone around you will change. The energetic, enthusiastic, authentic force that is within you will come to nurture and support you in everything you do.
When was the last time you wrote a letter to a friend? Not an email or a text message, but a real letter, handwritten from the heart?
When was the last time you called a friend or love one just to say I was thinking of you and care about you?
When was the last time you received a hug and kiss from a child?
Children are marvelous at giving love without the slightest expectation of anything in return. Their ego or society has not yet tainted their love, and so this process is natural for them. They do not know any other way, unless we show them one.
You may be thinking if I really become this person of greatness, that sends love and peace to everyone that I will just get taken advantage of and abused. Sadly, this may be true, but if unconditional love is really what you cultivate within your heart and soul, you will forgive them and love them for their unexcused actions. You will have an awareness that good will always prevail over evil and forgiveness over resentment.
Many years ago I was a non-believer in these universal principles. I believed like so many others, get them before they get you. How wrong I was. We always get what we give. There can be no other way, no other answer.
When we can live our lives from this place, then and only then can we reap the full health benefits to our body, heart, and soul that the universe is waiting to give to us. The healing sources that become available to you are unimaginable in common terms. The success and spiritual forces that will come to your cause will make the real difference in your life, and everyone you come into contact with. You will find that anything you desire, can, and will be yours. It will come to you, without thought or action on your part. It will continue to flow into your life.
Be the person that is the difference. Rather than just trying to make a difference.
When we leave this earth we can take nothing with us but the knowing
in our heart and soul, that we gave everything that we could,
Jeff Nis is a Professional Life Coach, Mentor, Author, and Business Consultant. Practicing universal principles to enrich lives and inspire others to be the best that they can be. Believing that inside each of us is the spirit of a soul waiting to be realized that will serve not only our individual needs, but also the needs of society. We each hold a greatness within us that possesses the power to be the difference.
With over 25 years experience in personal and professional development through books, articles, seminars, coaching, consulting, and hands on experience, he has helped many individuals and businesses realize their full potential. His leadership training, consulting experience, and hands on style, has lead to the successful development of many individuals and companies throughout the United States. Currently promoting his book, Reflections to Feelings, a Coach’s Journal which gives the reader an inside-out approach to many years of wisdom, education, and practical experience.
Books, articles, and services are available through the website,
www.YourLifeYourDreams.com
Jeff can be reached at jnis@centurytel.net or 509-209-1431
Remember when you were a child, a small bandage, a hug and a kiss could cure most anything, from a cut finger to a broken toy. That universal truth is still in existence. Love can still mend a broken heart, save a lonely soul, and heal a broken toe. It can bring joy to a saddened heart, light into darkness, and peace into a stressful situation. Love can cure depression, and addictions. It can be the force that can change any emotional event, circumstance, or situation into one of compassion, and empathy, and on occasion it can even bring sunshine to a rainy Saturday afternoon.
How do we bring more love into our lives?
How do we send out love?
I feel that we do not take the time to learn and develop the essence of this mystical universal principle of love heals all. While receiving love is no doubt the ultimate healing potion ever believed you must be able to send love before you can receive love. It is the sending of love to any other living being that creates the most beneficial results when it comes to the health and wellness of your heart and soul.
When love is an action instead of a feeling and sent out expecting nothing in return, the real magic begins. This universal principle of nature holds true in everything we do. Every action of love toward another living being, whether it be in spirit, a person, an animal, or plant, the universe will respond with magic back to you in many forms. The most common is the feeling of well being and euphoria that comes over your entire body. You naturally boost all of your immune systems. You walk with a spring in your step. You find that some of the small things that used to irritate you now don’t seem all that important. You find that each day you awake with a new vitality for life and a willingness to do something great.
So how do we use this universal law to be the best person toward others that we can be?
How do we send out unconditional love for everyone and everything into the universe without expectation of anything in return? Where do we start?
With yourself, always with yourself. It is an inside out approach.
Honesty, sincerity, and truthfulness are the foundations of this universal truth, and until you can be honest and truthful with yourself, and be sincere from within your heart in you actions, you can not realize these magical powers.
Before you can give away love to others you must have love to give away. It must come from a place within your soul that is serene and peaceful. Not full of stress, anxiety, jealousness, or a need to be first or more important than anyone else. If you are full of stress, anger, anxiety, and jealously, that’s what you send out to others. If you are full of kindness, peace, happiness, and love then that is what you to send out.
This may require a complete change from within you. Most of us feel that we are kind and loving people who would normally do most anything for another in need. We may put some loose change in the hand of the homeless. We send a check to a charity organization once a year, or give some can food to get a movie discount. These are all acts of kindness and this kindness may often be rewarded, but not with that warming feeling of peacefulness that spreads throughout your entire body, and causes you to look at yourself and others in a more loving way. The type of euphoric feeling I am referring to comes from deeper inside of us. It comes from a place where we do these unselfish acts unknowingly, because it is what we must do, not because we have a guilty conscious or an unmet need.
The only way that unselfish love will express itself from within you is if that is truly what is inside you. Almost as if you cannot send out anything else, think anything else, or be any other way toward yourself or another.
Start today, look at yourself in the mirror and make the choice that whatever events or circumstances come your way today, that in your heart of hearts you will respond with love, peace, and kindness. It may be another driver that cuts you off in traffic or a coworker that always seems to upset you with their words or actions. It may be a relative or loved one that you seem to always disagree with. Decide that today for everything that happens you will respond from that goodness in your heart, the unconditional love that was embedded in your spiritual soul at the time you were created. Decide to look for the good and the positive in any person, or situation.
Remarkable things will begin to happen. When you focus your attention on the good rather than the bad, the love, rather than the sad, you will begin to notice that everything around you will change. Everyone around you will change. The energetic, enthusiastic, authentic force that is within you will come to nurture and support you in everything you do.
When was the last time you wrote a letter to a friend? Not an email or a text message, but a real letter, handwritten from the heart?
When was the last time you called a friend or love one just to say I was thinking of you and care about you?
When was the last time you received a hug and kiss from a child?
Children are marvelous at giving love without the slightest expectation of anything in return. Their ego or society has not yet tainted their love, and so this process is natural for them. They do not know any other way, unless we show them one.
You may be thinking if I really become this person of greatness, that sends love and peace to everyone that I will just get taken advantage of and abused. Sadly, this may be true, but if unconditional love is really what you cultivate within your heart and soul, you will forgive them and love them for their unexcused actions. You will have an awareness that good will always prevail over evil and forgiveness over resentment.
Many years ago I was a non-believer in these universal principles. I believed like so many others, get them before they get you. How wrong I was. We always get what we give. There can be no other way, no other answer.
When we can live our lives from this place, then and only then can we reap the full health benefits to our body, heart, and soul that the universe is waiting to give to us. The healing sources that become available to you are unimaginable in common terms. The success and spiritual forces that will come to your cause will make the real difference in your life, and everyone you come into contact with. You will find that anything you desire, can, and will be yours. It will come to you, without thought or action on your part. It will continue to flow into your life.
Be the person that is the difference. Rather than just trying to make a difference.
When we leave this earth we can take nothing with us but the knowing
in our heart and soul, that we gave everything that we could,
to be the difference in someone's life.
About the author:
About the author:
Jeff Nis is a Professional Life Coach, Mentor, Author, and Business Consultant. Practicing universal principles to enrich lives and inspire others to be the best that they can be. Believing that inside each of us is the spirit of a soul waiting to be realized that will serve not only our individual needs, but also the needs of society. We each hold a greatness within us that possesses the power to be the difference.
With over 25 years experience in personal and professional development through books, articles, seminars, coaching, consulting, and hands on experience, he has helped many individuals and businesses realize their full potential. His leadership training, consulting experience, and hands on style, has lead to the successful development of many individuals and companies throughout the United States. Currently promoting his book, Reflections to Feelings, a Coach’s Journal which gives the reader an inside-out approach to many years of wisdom, education, and practical experience.
Books, articles, and services are available through the website,
www.YourLifeYourDreams.com
Jeff can be reached at jnis@centurytel.net or 509-209-1431
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